


Tarda Reverti

by Helie_Bloom



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, F/M, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Nobody is Dead
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-06
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-11 23:00:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29875308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Helie_Bloom/pseuds/Helie_Bloom
Summary: It was over. Freedom had been achieved. Blood had been spilled. The screams of the innocents met his ears, yet he turned the other way. The world itself had reset, the sins of the past wiped clean. Memories of the past only live in very few people, all of them burdened with that knowledge. Eren Jaeger knows that something isn’t right, that he has seen certain faces and heard specific voices before, but nobody seems to share that experience. Everyone carries on with their lives as if the great tragedies of long ago never happened. Will the past remain buried deep underground, or will it be exposed for everyone to see?
Relationships: Krista Lenz | Historia Reiss/Ymir, Levi Ackerman/Hange Zoë, Mikasa Ackerman/Eren Yeager, Nanaba/Mike Zacharias
Kudos: 21





	1. 1- To You, My Dear Usurper

All he could see was smoke, the world around him covered in a grey-hued haze. He could barely see in front of him, blindly walking forwards, trying to see even the silhouette of a person or building of some kind. All he found was more smoke. The ground shook, the gravel on the dirt roads ahead of him bouncing about as loud thumps met his ears. He started sprinting in that direction, running out of breath as he searched for the source of the noise, only to trip over something and fall on his face. The taste of copper met his tongue from the back of his throat as he slowly stood up, feeling warm liquid drip from his nose. He placed a hand on his upper lip, his fingers becoming covered in dark crimson. A shaky breath left his lips, eyes looking down to see what he tripped on in a world seemingly full of emptiness. His body went numb, unable to move as his eyes made contact with a corpse. They were wearing all black, some kind of belt weaving its way around their legs from their waist. They had on a small chestplate, a crest branded right above their hearts. He knelt down beside them, moving his face closer for a better look, wiping the blood from his nose with another hand. The crest was made up of two wings crossing over each other, one a deep sapphire blue and the other white like that of an angel’s. He moved his head in the direction where the face of the deceased should be, but instead of finding human features, all he found was flesh, not decorated with anything at all. A shaky cry of horror escaped him, some of the smoke clearing around him. The ground was littered with corpses of different kinds and mangled in different ways. There were many that were scattered across the ground, wearing the uniform with the winged crest like the first corpse he found. Others were wearing clothes of ordinary civilians. There were men, women, and children, some with broken arms, others with smashed heads. Some of their legs were positioned in odd angles, while others were flattened and in gigantic footprints. The boy felt a hand slowly hover above his mouth, unable to speak as he gazed upon the massacre before his eyes. Then, a voice from above began to speak, 

**“To the boy who sought freedom...goodbye.”**

The voice was shaky, low yet gentle. It was a woman for sure, a woman overwhelmed by grief and sorrow. His eyes widened slightly, recognizing that voice immediately, yet he couldn’t put his finger on who it belonged to. It was so familiar, almost as if he could picture its owner right in front of his eyes, but he couldn’t. No figure or face came to mind to give him an answer. All he felt was confusion and even the slightest bit of guilt. What was he guilty for? He didn’t even know this person. Why was he feeling so moved by seven simple words? Those answers were not going to be made known to him, not now at least. It was almost frustrating, not being able to figure things out right away. The voice was heard again, but it was not speaking a single word, only weeping. It started off soft, barely being able to be heard. Then it got louder, until it rose in a swift crescendo, every heavy sob causing the ground to shake. He covered his ears, shutting his eyes. He wanted everything to stop, but it got even more agonizing by the second, showing no sign of stopping. He let out a pained cry, one of torment and heartbreak. Why wouldn’t she stop? He heard someone calling his name once again, but this time it was different. It was the voice of a man, tone soft and warm. He knew that voice for sure, a shaky sigh of relief being the only thing he could muster. The voice kept calling his name, urging for him to wake up. The wailing of the woman faded, the corpses strewn across the ground turning into sand as the smoke cleared, leaving him engulfed in a void of pitch black. 

When his eyes opened, the first thing he noticed was the blurred face of his brother. Eren Jaeger rubbed his eyes, rolling over in bed and covering his head with his pillow. 

“Leave me alone, Zeke. It’s not even 9 yet,” He whined when his brother picked up the pillow and tossed it to the other side of the bed, laughing. 

“Actually, it’s the afternoon. Dad wanted me to wake you up earlier, but I was nice enough to let you sleep in before we head to the capitol building. It’s your first time at one of these things, so I suggest you  _ don’t  _ look like you got jumped on your way there.” 

“Shut up. Get out.” 

“Love you too, little bro.” Once the door closed, Eren ran a hand through his hair, looking at himself in the mirror across from his bed, grimacing at the dark circles around his eyes. Since college, he developed a horrendous sleeping schedule, much to his mother’s dismay. Maybe that was the cause of his weird dreams like the one he just experienced, but he wasn’t quite sure. He reluctantly got out of bed, shivering slightly as his bare feet touched the cold wooden floor. He got out his change of clothes and set them on his bed. It was a simple grey suit with a fedora, nothing too fancy. His mom forced him to pick it out the night before just in case he overslept and, like always, she was right. He showered and brushed his teeth, making sure his hair was neat and tidy for once instead of the horrendous bird’s nest it usually was on mornings like this. He went to his desk, reaching for the briefcase he packed the night before, opening and checking its contents. Everything from notebooks to pens and binder clips were in their rightful places, a great attempt at creating a good first impression. He had walked down the stairs where his father was reading the newspaper, his mother doing some dishes. 

“Dad, you have a phone. You don’t need to read the paper anymore,” He said, chuckling as Zeke let out a snort while he got his things together. Grisha rolled his eyes, a slight smirk tugging at his lips. 

“Well Eren, when you get to a certain age, you start to stay within the time period you feel most comfortable. Why would I need to be so high-tech when I have my paper right here?” Zeke rolled his eyes, fishing out his car keys from his pocket. 

“Newspapers are going to be obsolete soon, old man. Catch up with the times.” He said, patting his father on the back lightly. He walked towards the door, raising up his arm and shaking his car keys. 

“Come on, Eren. We need to go.” Carla immediately handed her son something wrapped in foil, a loving smile on her face. 

“Here’s your breakfast. Good luck, son. Zeke, make sure he doesn’t say anything rash. You know how he gets with politics.”Zeke laughed, grabbing his brother by the arm and advancing out the door towards the car. 

“Of course, Carla! We’ll be back before dinner.” Once in the car, Eren immediately took out his phone, looking at his brother. 

“Pass me the aux cord.” His brother merely laughed, pulling out of the driveway slowly.

“Hell no. Your music is straight-up garbage.” Eren shrugged, laying his head against the window, looking at the quickly passing road signs and houses. 

“I consider it to be examples of musical genius.”

“Uncontrollable screaming into a microphone aren't examples of musical genius.” 

“You’re one to talk. Who the hell cares about classical music anyway? It’s all noise, no meaning.” Zeke let out a hearty laugh, eyes still on the road. 

“Just for that, you’re  _ definitely  _ not getting the aux cord now.”

“Fine. I brought my headphones so  _ ha _ !” He replied, sticking out his tongue like a toddler who just lost an argument with their parents. Zeke smiled, briefly turning his head to look at his brother before looking back at the road. 

“Alright, just as a refresher for you before we go in there, why is the Council so important?” Eren closed his eyes, groaning as he leaned back in his seat. 

“What are you, my fourth-grade history teacher?” 

“Answer the question, Eren.” The boy sighed, sending a sharp glare at his brother before speaking. 

“It’s important because we’re the ones that propose laws and then the President of the Council approves them and sends it to the Queen to be approved via Royal Assent.” 

“Good. What’s your job?” Houses started morphing into skyscrapers, their large glass windows reaching beyond the clouds and into the Heavens. 

“As your legislative assistant, I’m supposed to help you with drafting, do research, give you recommendations, and take notes for you.” His words were spoken with clenched teeth, his stare icy as he looked back at his older brother, who was merely smiling. 

“For someone who’s lucky enough to get an opportunity like this, you sure sound unenthusiastic.”

“I just hate being quizzed over common knowledge. You know that.” 

“Such is life, Eren. It’s just constantly getting questions thrown at you, even if you don’t know the answers.”

“Okay, Aristotle.” Zeke’s face contorted into a bright grin as he laughed, driving them into the deepest part of the city. There were bright neon signs on business doors, the sidewalks overpopulated by people, the streets congested with taxis and cars. There were tight alleyways and street musicians all over the place. Eren felt himself get lost in the motion of the city. The fast pace, the diversity, everything seemed to be so welcoming to him. He had spent four years in the city attending Maria University, one of the first three schools in Paradis. The fact that he had gotten accepted was a great accomplishment, and one of the many things his family displayed with pride. The city felt like home to him, everything filled with life. He wished he could live there forever, but he definitely didn’t have the resources to do so right now.

He was snapped out of his thoughts when Zeke approached a large building that stood out from the rest of the city. For one thing, it had a whole section to itself, looking like a palace with intricately carved outer walls and large towers on every corner. There were guards every few feet, and the roof of the building was adorned with stone gargoyles and cherubs. It was enchanting, and Eren could only imagine what it looked like lit up at night, its reflection glowing on the ocean waves that it was next to it. Zeke seemed to notice his brother’s awe, smiling as he slowed down at a toll, rolling down his window and flashing his ID into a camera, the toll bars lifting and permitting him to drive into the parking lot. He carefully parked, eyes scanning his watch and smiling. 

“We’re early even with your oversleeping self.” He said, getting out of the car and taking his briefcase from the backseat, Eren following close behind. As the two walked, the guards eyed him carefully, the boy feeling his stomach fall slightly. Noticing his brother’s anxiety, he placed a hand on his shoulder. 

“Don’t worry about them. They’re always like that.” The boy merely nodded, staying close to Zeke as guards opened the doors for them, allowing them inside.

The place was filled with golden chandeliers, every single one intricately designed. The rest of the light flooded in through the large arch-shaped windows, shining on the red carpet and old yet nevertheless expensive paintings. Eren looked around, awestruck by the building’s beauty, mindlessly following his brother into one of the other rooms, presumably the room where all the discussions were going to be held. It was filled with rows upon rows of seats in almost every corner, other councilmen and women like Zeke making small talk with others, waiting for when their meeting would commence. Some of them glanced at Eren, with scorn or curiosity, Eren wasn’t sure. Zeke took his seat and patted the chair next to him, his little brother following his nonverbal command. 

“Don’t talk to any of them. Any word that leaves your mouth will be used against you in some way, shape, or form. Be very careful if you speak at all, and I wouldn’t recommend doing so when discussing serious topics. I don’t want your budding career to be ended because you said something stupid.”

“You know I’m careful about what I say.” That stirred a chuckle from his brother, Eren pouting in response as he got his notebook and pen ready, the President of the Council signaling that it was time for everyone to find their seats and prepare for their meeting to begin. 

The meeting itself started fairly boring, talking about topics such as taxing the wealthy and raising the minimum wage. Eren knew that government officials were merely self-serving and important issues such as the low minimum wage and the lenient taxes on the rich and powerful were never going to actually go anywhere. He merely took notes, listening to his brother’s occasional comments. He felt like he was sitting through a college lecture, or even worse, a bunch of squabbling children calling each other names and mimicking their personalities rather than their views on the idea being discussed. It irritated him and made this painful to listen to. A man stood up raising a hand. 

“If I may add my input.” That voice made Eren’s head snap up immediately, making eye contact with the source of the voice. It was a tall man, blonde hair combed neatly with a firm expression on his face. Suddenly, Eren’s world began to shift around him. He was on a rooftop, the town he was in surrounded by a large wall. The air smelled like death, the sky filled with smoke. He was with five other people, but only one face was recognizable. It was the face of the man who just spoke, but his skin was deathly pale, eyes barely open and gaze distracted, like he was zoning out. His torso was stained in blood, and he was wearing a uniform with the winged crest from the dream Eren had experienced the previous night. His chest was barely rising and falling, the life seeping its way out of his body, eyes becoming glazed over, staring at the sky. Eren blinked, the world around him beginning to change once more, reverting to the meeting room and he was once again sitting by his brother’s side. Zeke noticed the bewildered expression on his brother’s face and frowned, placing a hand on his shoulder. 

“Are you feeling okay?” He only got a numb nod in response, his brother entranced by the man speaking, listening intently to his words. 

“In regards to the foreign relations with Marley, we need to proceed with caution, yet nonetheless be aggressive. This is the second plane that they have shot down this month. If this continues, war could very well be on the horizon. We need to be prepared for that, and if they attack our men once more, we will not hesitate to let them know that our tolerance is low and that we will go to war. Now, I’m not saying that we storm into the country with our men blowing up entire cities, but that should be in our mind, especially since it is our duty as the Council of Paradis to ensure the safety and prosperity of our people.” Eren gritted his teeth, not being able to control himself any longer. He stood up, making contact with the man he seemed to be familiar with. 

“Councilman, have you lost your mind?” All eyes were on him now, Zeke immediately grabbing his brother’s shoulder and trying to pull him back down to his seat. 

“Eren, sit down-“

“No. Do continue, young man.” The councilman seemed intrigued by his sudden objection, let alone the irritation that was flooding his words.

“How could you talk about human lives like they’re numbers? Every single life in Paradis matters, and you have made that very apparent in your statement, as you want the country and its people to grow and prosper. How can you not say the same for Marley? While their government is messed up, I won’t deny it, there are still innocent people at stake. Are you just ready to kill innocents for the sake of  _ our  _ government which is just as flawed as theirs just in different ways? I mean, look at all of you, calling each other names and attacking your political parties instead of talking about the issue given like adults! You are supposed to be representatives of the people and get shit done. Start acting like it.” The room was silent, Zeke shoving his brother back onto his chair, standing up and chuckling nervously.

“Sorry about that, folks. He’s new here and hasn’t learned the way things in here work just yet. Please, waive everything he said.” The stunned gazes and jaws on the floor didn’t seem to phase Eren much, no regrets in his heart. He stood by what he said, and he was unapologetic about it regardless of the outrage it might generate from everyone else in the room, including Zeke. 

When the meeting concluded, Zeke packed his things up quickly, not speaking to his brother. Anyone with a brain could tell that he was furious, but Eren was no first-time observer of his brother’s rage. He grabbed Eren’s arm once the two were packed and began to leave, but the councilman from before stopped them at the doorway. 

“Ah, councilman Jaeger, I was meaning to ask you something.”

“What is it, Smith?”

“Can I speak to your assistant outside? There is something that I’d like to discuss with him.” Eren was rendered completely speechless. Did this man see the vision that he saw just a few hours ago? Did he recognize Eren from a time that seemed so long ago? It was very well a possibility, and with how angry Zeke was at him, he wasn’t sure if he could ever get another chance to speak to the man. 

“Of course,” Eren blurted out, the man smiling and walking down the hall, gesturing for the boy to follow. He gave Zeke an apologetic look before following behind the taller gentleman. He took them to the courtyard, where a statue of an angel with an arm towards the sky stood. Eren looked around, examining the flowers in the vibrant courtyard. There were so many different types and so many vibrant colours. The man seemed to notice and pointed to a patch of bright orange flowers. He examined them closely, a ghost of a smile on his face. 

“These are my favorites. Orange lilies. They’re beautiful, no?” Eren studied them closely, smiling slightly as he nodded. 

“They are.” The man seemed to focus his gaze elsewhere, looking off into the distance. 

“I value what you said back there in the meeting. It was passionate, and no form of corruption touched your words. They were genuine and with Paradis’s best interests in mind. I don’t understand why Jaeger tried to shut you up. It was just what those stiffs in the Council needed to hear, myself included.” He walked towards Eren, chuckling as he extended his hand for the boy to shake. 

“I’m councilman Erwin Smith from Rose.” The name was so familiar, yet Eren wasn’t sure where he heard it before. All he could think about was the deceased man on the rooftop, staring at the sky and how vividly he remembered that day, even though he has never experienced such a thing in his entire life. He shook the man’s hand, mustering a nervous smile. 

“Eren Jaeger.” Smith seemed amused, unable to hold back a few chuckles. 

“Ah, so you’re Zeke’s little brother. No wonder he wanted you to shut up so badly. He didn’t want us to use your words against him.”

“Yeah, that’s kind of his philosophy.” That resulted in more laughs, Smith having to wipe some tears from his eyes. 

“So, what’s your story? What did you come here to do?” Eren shuffled in place, trying to formulate the right words. 

“Well, I went to Maria University for political science. I wanted to be on the Council like my brother and make genuine change, unlike lots of the power-hungry  dipshits we have right now who just do whatever it takes to make themselves look better, no offense to you, of course.” Erwin chuckled, looking down at the boy and smiling. 

“Maria University is one of the best schools. That’s impressive within itself. Your ambitions are genuine, and you proved it today with your words. I think you’re going to make a great politician, definitely better than your brother. You have my support and encouragement, even if we may disagree on some things.”

“Thanks, Zeke just doesn’t understand that we can’t sit by and watch people make stupid decisions and follow for the sake of preserving our reputations. We need to take the initiative and fight!” 

“I wholeheartedly agree. I have dedicated my heart to the people I serve, and intend on only having their interests in mind, even if it doesn’t seem to be that way sometimes. No matter what, we can’t please everyone, and we will without a doubt face opposition, but the important thing we need to do as politicians is fight for what we believe in, no matter how many people try to refute our beliefs. Your mentality is going to get you very far, farther than Zeke for sure.” It felt good to be praised for his actions, and Eren couldn’t help but smile. 

“You think so?”

“I firmly believe it. I’ve been in this type of work for years, and I know when I see potential. Keep moving forward, and remain firm in your beliefs. With that determination, you can’t fail.” The two were snapped out of their conversation when Zeke walked over, a slight frown on his face. 

“Are you done indoctrinating my brother, Smith?” Smith merely smiled, gently pushing Eren towards his brother.

“We were just finished talking. I enjoyed our chat, Eren. Remember what I said. I really do hope that we see each other again,” He said, Zeke already dragging Eren away towards the parking lot. Eren pulled away from him, looking back at Smith one last time. 

“Mr. Smith, have I seen you before?” There was an odd silence, nobody moving to say anything. Smith glanced back at him, staring at him before sighing and shaking his head. 

**“I’m afraid not.”**

Eren’s words overwhelmed Erwin’s mind immensely. He couldn’t seem to understand why the boy seemed so desperate for a “yes” or what made the question arise in the first place. This was the first time he’s seen a young man like him. Not once has he ever seen someone so passionate about helping out his people over his own reputation. He’s spent years sitting with narcissistic puppets, engulfed in meetings that never actually got anything done. This young man was special, and he had a feeling that he would be able to carry on the values that Erwin himself shared. The readiness to take scorn and opposition for the sake of Paradis and the stained reputations that they both would carry was inevitable. He just hoped the boy’s temper wouldn’t make it worse for him. 

He knew that he was going to spend a few long hours that night going over papers and answering emails, not like that was a foreign concept to him. He pulled over into the side of a street, walking past bookstores and dance studios. The city was always full of diverse businesses and the people even more so. It was always comforting to him. He stopped in front of one particular shop that he liked. It was right by Maria University, so it was usually filled with stressed teenagers or young lovers. He always came during the early evening to get something before diving into his work. The business was extremely well-run, constantly getting good reviews and from personal experience, Erwin knew that it was well deserved. He opened the door, bells ringing to signify someone new had entered. There was shuffling from one of the storage closets before the owner actually walked to the register, a ghost of a smile on his face.

**“Welcome back, Erwin.”**

**“Hello, Levi.”**

  
  
  
  



	2. I See You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He finally found his peace, but at what cost?

Erwin took a seat at one of the freshly wiped tables in the shop, Levi opening a cabinet and taking out a cup and coffee cup sleeve, making sure not to forget the lid. 

“What’ll it be today, Smith?” Erwin chuckled, eyes scanning work emails from his phone, typing back quick yet thorough replies. 

“The usual. You just  _ love  _ asking me for the thrill of it, huh?” Levi started preparing a cup of coffee, a small grin painted on his face. 

“You know, for this being a  _ tea  _ shop, you sure love ordering coffee.” 

“It’s money in your pocket, so you should be happy either way.”

“Such a wise guy. How was your day today?” Erwin gratefully took the piping hot cup from Levi’s hands, opening his wallet and fishing out a ten-dollar bill, handing it to him and getting a receipt in return. 

“You know, listening to grown adults poking insults at each other like children in a daycare center. Interestingly enough, there was a boy that swung by today with Zeke Jaeger. He stunned the Council with his words. He was furious, seeing his government act so foolishly. I haven’t seen the youth speak up in such a long time. It was quite refreshing.” Levi hummed in understanding, spraying tables with disinfectant and wiping them down. His hand was shaking slightly, trying to convince himself that letting his guard down now could prove to be a fatal mistake. 

“A kid, huh? I’m assuming he’s not a literal one and you just exaggerated your words. What did he talk about? Anything interesting, besides telling adults to act like adults?”

“Well, he opposed my take on war-”

“Anyone with a brain would want to avoid war, Erwin.”

“He was extremely passionate, not hiding his real emotions for the sake of professionalism. He let them see and hear his rage, showing his true colours. I, for one, love it. He reminds me of myself when I was younger.” Levi laughed a bit, remembering a time of what once was. He put his cleaning supplies back in their closet, taking out a broom moments later. 

“That’s interesting. Do you mind telling me his name? If he’s anything like you, I’m sure he’ll make a name for himself soon and I’d like to know it before the media gets ahold of it and it’s all over the news.” Levi silently prayed, hoping that the name that Erwin would utter was not the one he had in mind. Everything made too much sense, so much sense that the answer was apparent even without a response from his friend. He knew that it was a fact the boy was here in this world, but the thought of him being in a position of power was inconceivable to him. 

“Eren Jaeger.” Levi felt his stomach drop, his body frozen in place, his brain unable to produce a coherent thought for just a few moments. Eren Jaeger. It was a name that caused him immense relief and fear all at once, and no other man has ever been able to cause such a thing to overwhelm him. He drew in a deep breath, forcing himself to keep sweeping the floor of his shop. 

“Zeke's brother, I assume. No wonder he was there in the first place. His brother’s giving him an in for his political career. That’s smart on his part, I’ll give him that.” 

“Oddly enough, he’s nothing like Zeke. He’s more passionate, more proactive and assertive in getting what he wants. Zeke just stands on the sidelines and passively waits for his turn to speak and refutes counterarguments while minding another person’s feelings. He’s static, yet Eren pushes openly for what he wants and I’ll assume once he’s in the Council, which I’m sure he will be, he’ll openly announce what he wants to do and how he wants it done. Perhaps we need that now more than ever, especially with our country being on the verge of war.” For someone who cannot recall who this boy was and what he did in the time of long ago, Erwin surely got his character down easily. That was Erwin Smith though, long ago or in the present. 

“Well, this will surely be interesting then and I’m sure you’ll watch and work with him closely.” Erwin took a sip from his coffee, turning his head towards Levi. 

“Enough about me. How are you and the spouse doing?” Levi couldn’t help but smile at the thought of his marriage, looking up from the floor and chuckling. 

“You know Hange, always out and about, never really settling down until early morning. They’re really making a name for themselves, though. They recently got an interview about their research on fossil fuels and their effects on the environment. I’m sure their work has been discussed in your little Council meetings, even though some of those dumbasses don’t believe in climate change.” That stirred a laugh from Erwin, the man nodding as he put his coffee cup down. 

“That’s right. We have discussed Hange’s work, and believe it or not, many were actually willing to listen to their research. You’re one lucky guy, Levi. They wouldn’t be where they are right now without your support.” 

“Well, that’s my job as a husband. That’s a basic requirement in a marriage, you know? You’re not just worrying about yourself anymore. You’re worried about each other and meeting the other person’s needs all the time. It’s a team effort. I’ll do anything I can to make Hange’s life easier and I know they’ll always do the same for me. We dedicated our hearts to each other, and while we’re tested sometimes, we still hold those vows to the highest degree. Sure, Hange can be an absolute mess. I mean, they sometimes forget how to take care of themselves, especially when they’re obsessed with their recent findings, but that’s just Crazy Hange,” He replied, using a nickname the two established for them years ago. A thought occurred to Erwin, one that made him chuckle just considering it. 

“Have you and Hange considered having a family yet?” The man stopped sweeping, leaning against the broom as he tried thinking about a sensible answer from a topic that swam around in his mind almost daily. 

“We’ve talked about it, yeah. Hange doesn’t mind having a kid, but I suggested we wait until a little bit later, maybe a year or two, you know? Hange’s career is really taking off now and I don’t want a kid to hold them back in their work, which is something they value so much. We both want a kid, yeah, but if Hange has to give something up for one right now, it wouldn’t be one of the wisest things to push forward. We decided to wait at least a year until they can really settle into the changes that have been happening career-wise.” Erwin nodded slowly, getting up and laying his hand on Levi’s shoulder. 

“With a thought process like that, you’re going to be a great father, considering others before yourself the way you just did. You’re gonna have one lucky kid.” Levi laughed, checking the time and turning off the neon “we’re open” sign hanging behind the glass of his display window. 

“I appreciate that, man. Besides, I already have to deal with Hange who’s like a toddler in a grown person’s body. I’ve got my work cut out for me enough as it is.” Erwin threw out his disposable cup into the trash, making his way towards the door. 

“I still stand by what I said. You’ll make a great father, Levi. I’ll make sure to swing by tomorrow, okay?” 

“I always look forward to it. G’night, Smith.”

“Goodnight, Levi.” Once the bells of the door rang and Erwin’s towering form was gone, Levi let out a shaky breath, running a clammy hand through his hair. 

“Damn it, Jaeger. You’re the same brat you’ve always been,” He mumbled, putting the broom back in the closet and got his things before locking the doors of the tea shop and heading to his car. Once inside, he just leaned back against the seat, taking in deep breaths. He knew this day was going to come eventually. It was a heavy possibility, one that weighed in on his mind since he began to remember everything, yet he never really wanted it to come true. He cared for the boy, yet that didn’t erase all of the bloodshed he witnessed because of him. His cousin was always distraught thinking of where Jaeger was at that point in time. She would spend days and nights just wondering what he was doing, and it broke Levi’s heart to see his cousin in such a way. However, he knew the two had to continue on, acting as if the world’s tragedies have not occurred in order to blend in with the rest. 

When Levi grew close to his home, he noticed that Hange’s car wasn’t in the driveway. 

“They must still be at work. Go figure,” He whispered to himself, getting out and unlocking the door, immediately feeling more relaxed now that he was home. He put his car keys in the ceramic bowl by the door, admiring the wedding photos and college pictures hanging on the wall. Just looking at the old days made a sense of nostalgia overcome him, yet that feeling never passed, especially for someone like him: a man who lived twice and still stands with those memories. For a life he valued greatly, it came with one of the greatest curses he could ever fathom. He unconsciously fiddled with his wedding ring, remembering the words Erwin had spoken about Eren.

“No matter what, you’ll always remain the same, Eren.” He got started on dinner right away. Hange was always out late, on the way to discovering the next big thing of science. They’d ramble on and on for hours about their research, and not once has Levi tuned them out. He valued every single conversation, knowing what it was like for all that he took for granted to vanish in seconds. The loneliness was agonizing, and through his broken stare in the time of long ago, anyone could’ve noticed the internal wounds he sustained every single day. Those were the days he was cursed to remember, and he was forbidden from uttering a single word of them. 

While he cooked, he heard the front door creak open, his body tensing up a bit, but that was just a habit that he carried with him into the next life. He felt arms wrap around him, his head moving upwards to meet the warm gaze of Hange. 

“Hey, shorty.” 

“Oh, please. I’m five foot five. You’re taller than me by an inch.” He only got more giggles in response, the man going back to cooking. 

“Don’t be salty because I will forever tower over you.” 

“One inch isn’t towering over me. That just means you can help me reach things on the top shelf. Anyway, you’re home early for once.” Hange took a look at the cookbook Levi had open on the kitchen counter, washing their hands and moving to help him. 

“Yeah, for once. I hired a new assistant today to work beside Moblit. His name is Armin Arlert. He’s a really bright kid, graduating at the top of his class at Maria University. He even graduated a few years early he was so smart.” Levi almost cut his hand while chopping up vegetables, feeling all the oxygen leave his body. Armin seemed like such a distant memory, even though Mikasa mentioned him in their occasional calls. The boy’s intelligence was one of his best features, of course, it made sense Hange would be the one to finally find him like they did Moblit years ago. 

“Good for you. You’re so important that you’ve got  _ two  _ assistants now. Next thing you know, you’ll have people reading your name in their textbooks.” Hange cackled, waving their hand dismissively. 

“I don’t think so. Not yet, at least. How was business at the shop today?”

“Packed as always. Didn’t really get that much time to breathe it was so busy.” 

“Who would’ve thought your side dream would be so successful. You’re definitely happier than you were in the courts. I mean, you looked badass in a suit, but you still looked unhappy.” Levi smiled, turning to Hange with a raised eyebrow. 

“It made money, though. It got me to where I needed to be to even consider opening the shop. The number one rule in my family is to establish yourself before you work on your side projects, which proved to be true. Erwin visited again today.” Hange whipped their head around to face him, their face now plastering a grin from ear to ear. 

“Really, now? What did he say?”

“Well, he asked about you, and I told him about how you’re on your way to becoming the next supergenius.” Hange laughed, pecking Levi’s cheek gently. 

“You flatter me too much.”

“It’s true, four eyes. He asked when we’re gonna have a baby.”

“He wants to be an uncle that badly, huh?”

“You’d think so. I told him the same thing I always do.” Hange paused for a moment, Levi setting the table for the two of them quietly. 

“You know, I don’t mind going against the plan and having mini Ackerman come earlier.” Levi ran a hand through his hair. 

“Hange, I really don’t think it’s wise right now, especially for you.” He kissed their cheek gently. After dinner was finished, Levi did the dishes, mind still on the topic of Eren. The boy has a huge opportunity in the political world, and the way things turned out last time, he didn’t want history repeating itself. Everything about the time of long ago still lingered in his mind vividly, yet he wasn’t allowed to utter a single word of it. People would consider him to be mentally ill or out of touch with reality, entranced too much in his own daydreams. Some days, he tried to convince himself that it was all just a work of his own imagination, yet he realized that the opposite was the truth, and that was one of the hardest pills he’s ever had to swallow. 

He took a seat next to Hange, laying his head against their shoulder. Hange glanced down at him, adjusting their glasses before running a hand through his hair. 

“Who would’ve thought selling  _ tea _ would take so much out of you.”

“You’d think it’d be easy, right?” He chuckled, sitting up a bit. 

“I mean, you were a lawyer handling business of all things. It was hard as hell. I still remember the nights you passed out in your office until early morning going over all the paperwork.” 

“You’re one to talk. You do the same damn thing.” Hange laughed, leaning back and wrapping an arm around him gently, pulling their husband closer. 

“It was still worth it, though. I mean, when you bought the shop, it was in shambles. Leave it to Mr. Clean to fix it up in weeks, though. It looked like a completely different place when you were done with it.” The place had water damage galore, and even a bad termite infestation. It was seemingly a lost cause, but Levi didn’t seem to think so. This was not the hardest thing he was presented with in life. He spent ungodly hours daily renovating, barely taking breaks for himself. The property started out as a cluster of wood, mold, and dust and ended up becoming one of the most popular hangout spots in the area. 

“I wouldn’t have been able to do it all without your help, Hange.” 

“Hey, we’re married. We’re a team. Your dreams are my dreams and vice versa.”

“What did I ever do to deserve you?” 

“Stare at me like a deer in headlights the first time we met in college. I still remember it so well. You were in my biology class and when we were lab partners, you were staring at me for ages. It felt like years, to be honest.” 

“You asked if I was high!”

“I had to check! You creeped me out!” They laughed, a soft chuckle escaping Levi. When he met Hange in college, he had to make sure it was really them. He ran every single detail about his long-lost friend through his mind, unable to believe that they were right there in front of him. Years of loneliness, only having memories of Hange to go by, and finally, they were right there in front of him. He was left breathless, overwhelmed by absolute awe and heartache, wanting to tell them everything, but knew he was unable to mention a single word of the past. That was one of the hardest parts of being who he was. They were unified in marriage and bound by love, yes, but never would he be able to explain where the nightmares came from or why he would just pause in the middle of doing the simplest tasks and just cry. He wasn’t in that hell anymore, but mentally, it never left him. It would never leave him. Levi wrapped a few strands of Hange’s hair around his finger, twirling it gently. 

“Do you know how much you mean to me?”

“You tell me every single morning, afternoon, and night, Levi dear.” 

“Don’t you ever forget it, okay shitty glasses?” Hange frowned, sitting up completely and looking at him, brows furrowed. 

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah. It’s fine,” He said, waving his hand dismissively. Hange crossed their arms, raising an eyebrow. 

“Levi Ackerman, you know I can tell when you’re lying. Spill it.” 

“It’s nothing. I just remembered something today that I’ve wanted to forget.”

“You wanna talk about it?” 

“I can’t really give you the context, so I’d sound like a psycho if I explained it.” 

“No matter what you say, you’ll never sound as crazy as  _ me _ , okay? Try and spill it the best way you can without telling me what you don’t want me to know.” Levi thought for a moment, trying to put together the words and ideas that floated around in his brain, arranging fragmented memories and painful truths that he wanted to cast away into nothingness if he could. 

“Well, someone I knew a long time ago was brought up today. They really were a good person, someone who was always there to stand up for those who couldn’t stand up for themselves. They were willing to sacrifice their own happiness so that those they loved could carry on and live free lives. Some people nowadays would call him a monster, a devil, but if you ever did, you never understood him to begin with. He became who he was because of the cruel world around him, and if I found a way to save him from the way everything ended ages ago, I would have in a heartbeat. He was a little shit, but he was a kid I cared about.” Hange remained quiet, listening to their husband’s words. They pulled him close, wrapping their arms around him entirely, just sitting there in silence to give him a chance to breathe if he needed to. 

“Well, they seem like a lovely person, and they obviously meant a lot to you. I’m sorry that you were forced to remember whatever it was that you wanted to forget. That’s how life is, being reminded of the things we would rather let just drift away and stay forgotten. I know that you have things you don’t want to tell me about, and that’s perfectly fine, but please just remember that nothing you say could ever make me feel betrayed if you withheld it from me. We’re a team, and we work out these problems together. I don’t know what this person did that upset you or scarred you so much, but I know that whatever it was, it hurt you more than a physical wound ever could. They obviously hurt you and no matter how much you want to hate them for it, you can’t because you still care about them. Am I wrong?” Levi’s face began to heat up, vision blurring as his eyes became glassy. He felt tears slowly make their way down his cheeks. He was never able to be so vulnerable like this in the past, always having to look out for the younger ones, making sure they coped with war and continued on. He never had much time to reflect on himself, and he had to look strong for everyone else. It didn’t work that way with Hange. They saw right through his lies, knew when there was something burdening him. They knew when he was drowning in his own thoughts and was there to save him from them. He sniffled a bit, wiping his tears away quietly as Hange pulled him closer, rubbing his back soothingly. 

“Don’t you dare hold back those tears. Let them out.” How was he able to refrain from tears for so many decades, so many losses? Every single bloody patch with the wings of freedom was burned into his mind to this day, every single face of his lost comrades still vivid in his memory. How was he able to stay strong through it all? That’s right, it was because he had no choice. They were in life or death situations every single day, the possibility of a tomorrow not guaranteed. He couldn’t  _ afford _ to cry. He had so many people to take care of. He clung onto Hange tightly, body shaking as he sobbed. Hange shushed him softly, whispering sweet nothings to him. He moved away from them, wiping his tears quickly. He still wasn’t used to breaking down like that in front of someone. 

“T-Thanks, four eyes.”

“Of course. We don’t have to talk about it right now if you’re emotionally spent. You should just get ready for bed, turn in early tonight.”

“I-I think I might.” 

“And there’s nothing wrong with that. I’m really proud of you for opening up about that. I know stuff like that’s hard for you,” They whispered, holding his hand and intertwining his fingers with their own. He nodded, not even able to deny it. 

“It really can be. I’m sorry that I don’t talk about it that much with you.” 

“Don’t you dare apologize, mister. You obviously have things that you deal with internally, and they might be things that I don’t understand and maybe I won’t ever be able to understand, and that’s okay. I knew from the day we started dating that there were going to be things that you weren’t going to be able to tell me and that’s  _ okay _ , regardless of the reason. We needed to establish that trust, that ability to walk with each other into the unknown. Now, there are things that I don’t know about you and there are things that you don’t know about me, yet we’re always able to continue on and persevere. That’s something that not everyone has and it’s something that I know both of us appreciate. That being said, how could I ever get mad at you for not talking about things like this? We all deal with things in various ways, and this is just your way of doing things. Regardless, I’m always going to be here for you and back you up and I know for a fact that you’ll always be here to back  _ me _ up, so don’t you apologize for holding back. I’m proud of you for even speaking up in the first place.” 

“Thank you, Hange. Seriously, I mean it.” Hange smiled even more and wiped some stray tears from his face. 

“Of course, Levi. I’m always going to be here for you. You should get going to bed before I drag you there myself.” 

“Isn’t that my job?”

“Well, it’s mine now!” Levi mustered a light chuckle, getting up. 

“I’ll make sure to, but I have to make a call really fast.” 

“Don’t be too long! I’ll drag ya!”

“Understood, Hange.” He walked out to the front porch, the light above their door flickering on as he searched through his contacts, tapping the number he needed to call. It rang for a few seconds before the person on the other end picked up. 

“Hey, what’s up?”

“I finally found it out, Mikasa.”

“Wait, are you serious?”

“Yeah. I found Eren, and to make things better, I found Armin.” 


End file.
